When the Words Hurt

For the past four months, I have been living a nightmare I can’t wake up from. I know that the story is one that should be told, and I’ve sat down many times to try to write it all down.

It makes me cry.

Reliving the pain, the hurt, the shame of my experiences is gut-wrenching. There are days when I sit with my laptop, bang out a few paragraphs, and then just sit and ball for an hour.

Why tell the story?

Some of the greatest creators we’ve ever known created their masterpieces out of pain. They faced the hurt and made it into something the world could celebrate. Your pain doesn’t have to be for naught. The shame or hurt you faced could help another person better face their own trauma someday. If you have a story that must be told – even if it’s only to your laptop or diary – you must get the words out sooner or later, lest your creativity become malignant and hurt you further.

Facing the Pain

Short sessions are best. Like visiting a therapist, sessions shouldn’t go for more than an hour or two. Otherwise healthy catharsis can turn to melancholy funk.

Plan something joyful for afterward. Blow your nose, wash your puffy eyes, and take a walk in the sunshine. Pop your favorite comedy into the DVD player. Have lunch with a friend.

Don’t make a bad day worse. It can be tempting to use an already bad mood to get the painful words out. But this can run the risk of pushing you into a deep depressive mood. Wait until you can focus just on the one story.