Don’t act like you’re hiring a full-time employee. - I’m shocked by how many people request formal resumes and such from potential freelancers. What’s worse though is that today I saw a company asking for things like cumulative GPAs. Folks, these traditional requests are fine if you’re hiring an employee. They’re often completely overboard when hiring someone for short-term per-project gigs. Instead look at their portfolios. Their work will speak for itself. (And frankly, there’s no reason you need someone’s GPA to hire them as a part-time, freelance blogger. That’s just silly and makes a bad impression – this particular advertiser came across as absurdly demanding for example with their list of requirements.)

I’ve seen ads like this. They’re so frustrating, because obviously some automaton in HR drafted the ad according to company hiring policy for employees, and no one has a clue how to hire a contractor. Ads for freelance writing gigs that ask you for transcripts or a list of every job you’ve ever had since McDonald’s when you were 15 are completely out of line (the exception being anything that requires a government security clearance, of course). You want to hire me as a writer, but want to know about when I mowed lawns in college? How does that apply in any way, shape or form to me writing your marketing copy?

And you want free custom samples? Are you on crack? Tell ya what: I’ll do for you what my tailor does for me. If I want something bespoke, I place a deposit that covers the cost of materials. Then if I return and hate the piece my tailor made for me, I lose the deposit. No hard feelings – we’re both covered. I don’t have to buy the piece, and he’s not out of pocket (this happened once with a pair of leather pants when I was a dominatrix – we moved on and continued our professional relationship). Seriously, do you go to a restaurant, eat a meal, then tell the waiter it was “just a sample” and you shouldn’t have to pay for it since you didn’t like it all that much? If I were the waiter you tried that on, I’d punch you in the stomach repeatedly till you vomited, thereby breaking you of a very bad habit of ripping off restaurants.

I’m so glad Jennifer wrote that piece. I think it should be sent to every person who places an unrealistic and ludicrous ad on Craigslist, looking to exploit freelance writers.

I had applied for a website content gig, through Craigslist if I remember correctly. I heard back from the client later the same day, and she seemed really excited to get things going. We chatted back and forth before I sent her some samples to give her an idea of what I could do for her.

Her response to these samples? “They do nothing for me.”

Ouch. Nothing? Not even make you itchy or something?

At first I felt like I’d been slapped, but I figured I had a chance to save this business relationship if only I dug deeper to find out what the client was really looking for (her instructions had been somewhat vague at the outset). So I asked her some questions about exactly who she would be marketing to, and more importantly I asked how hard a sell she wanted. My samples had all be very soft sells – suggestions more than anything.

I never heard back from her again. I really did “nothing for her” I guess.

Instead of being upset, I found the whole thing rather funny. What a way to address someone in a business transaction – a dismissive comment with absolutely no critique as to why you didn’t like it. Clearly I wasn’t meant to work with her. She wasn’t – as Havi Brooks always talks about – one of my right people.

So I didn’t let the rejection get to me. I got right back on the horse (I love that analogy, because I once was actually thrown from a horse and got back on it. A proud moment indeed) and kept plugging away to find my right people.

The very next day after this absurd rejection, I got a call from a guy who not only liked my work, but liked my mouthiness. My style. He was one of my right people, and I had applied to him on the same day as I had applied to Little Miss Not That Into You. I’ve been working with him ever since, and we’re getting along swimmingly.

Look, I hate rejection as much as the next person. I’d make a shitty telemarketer, because I’d probably cry all day. But I believe in myself, my talent and my product. I know someone else out there will, too. It just might take a little hunting is all.

I strongly suggest that anyone who wants to break into freelance writing or blogging for a living tries Ali Hale’s Staff Blogging Course. Do a read-through of the 6 modules, then go back and put the lessons into practice. I did, and have since scored TWO THREE blogging jobs in the last three weeks. Cost of the course: $19. Income of jobs I’ve scored: $125/wk. $180/wk.

For me, I have this strange nurturing streak (only in work, not in “real life”), so I present myself as someone who can help my clients. I am always at the ready to assist and contribute to the overall project.

I am understanding, empathetic, and offer advice on many levels – from the job at hand to general administrative or technological issues.

I believe in my case it comes from years in an administrative role with various types of companies. Being a right-hand (wo)man to so many different people ensures that I am always one step ahead in anticipating needs. I now translate this to my freelance clients in a conversational voice. I suppose my niche is sincerity.

Update: Renegade Writer Diana Burrel talks of her “code”.